this is not a poem

dry ice explosions at LAX; flights delayed no one harmed
i said it before but ill say it again:
let's eject the waltons & rave in their bunker

this is not a poem
this is not a poem
the other day you watched youtube videos
about neo liberalism // social marxism // &self immolation

mormons make the best murderers
but we all know that technology can get your groceries
for free (not a song from the 1980's)

this is not a poem
this is not a poem
the other day you watched youtube videos
about geomancy // the prison complex // &ufo's

senate may come to a decision & avoid default
while the NSA collects address books
i'm still about that party in the walton's bunker

this is not a poem
this is not a poem
the other day you watched youtube videos
about existentialism // necromancy // &quantum physics



...this is not a poem

fraud & torture

dollar store headphones
china turned the treble up
& forgot about the bass

from far away
things look...ok
it's only after close inspection
{peel back layers of PET}
    {tests are  made}
   {fraud fraud fraud}
   
/////////////////////////////////

stirring controversy is as easy as
as easy as
as easy as
saying something unpopular
and that can be distracting
fer sure fer sure fer sure

fer sure she said
don't torture yerself
thru
crunching candy teeth
chewing
the sound of chewing ice
in a quiet room
is torture enough
mechanical // mechanism //mecca

fer sure she said
don't torture yerself
thru
slit slice eyelids
scathing
piercing thru my back
is torture enough
mechanical // mechanism //mecca

fer sure she said
don't torture yerself
thru
vivid memory dreams
ephemeral
REM firing synaptic visual cortex
is torture enough
mechanical // mechanism //mecca

/////////////////////////////////

dollar store headphones
china turned the treble up
& forgot about the bass

from far away
things look...ok
it's only after close inspection
{peel back layers of PET}
    {tests are  made}
   {fraud fraud fraud}

cultural death // a conversation about my childhood

i dont think i come from a place of love

: you were raised in the suburbs

: of nj

: death

: in an influential town

: cultural death

: theres no love in those places

: just caaaash

: and two faced fucks

ru dedicated?

////////////////////////////////////////////////

“exceptionally sharp mind//tremendous energy//absolute dedication to mission”

////////////////////////////////////////////////

ru dedicated to our mission to dupe the populace?
we are building a massive surveillance machine and we want to know//ru dedicated?
we cant afford to hire any more snowdens or mannings, clrly...
the mission is simply this: it will come out in the wash//but right now//we can't afford transparency
if you are dedicated
we can pay you
all you need to sacrifice are ideals
which are just uhm...ideas
they arent uhm...tangible
unlike cash, unlike you and your commitment to this agency

////////////////////////////////////////////////

"As legal adviser to the National Security Council, Ms. Haines, 43//studies the legal implications of the most delicate operations
//lethal drone strikes, cyberattacks and intelligence collection on American soil."

////////////////////////////////////////////////

ru dedicated to our mission to dupe the populace?
we are building a massive surveillance machine and we want to know//ru dedicated?
we cant afford to hire any more snowdens or mannings, clrly...
all we need you to do is say large//empty//words
the trick of speaking a lot but saying little
we noticed that you have a knack for it back in the 90's at harvard law, we saw you there
...and at the "erotica nights" your bookstore hosted
if you are dedicated
we can pay you
all you need to sacrifice is your time
but as established
we want the semantics

////////////////////////////////////////////////

"citing the investigation into leaking of information about the federal government’s sweep of telephone and Internet data under a law passed after the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks"
false flag attacks flyin in the wind, it takes 10 yrs to set the stage
side: bj franklin wanted the national bird to be a turkey b/c eagles were mean ass opportunistic feeders//think about THAT alternate reality

////////////////////////////////////////////////

he's gotta thumb drive and we takin him out
ru dedicated?

perspective

you tole em i was crazier than you
it COULD be true
but ima venture that
well
no
it's not true
im just italian

D&D die

let's talk about the digitalized literature argument
unraveling...

b/c it's all ephemeral bb
and if great literature is timeless why are there so many footnotes?

at the same time people were writing for posterity
...other people were not

this has been the case since before print
popular fiction is not always: literature is not always popular
see: faulkner (oop before the pocket version)
that's my favorite reference for literary popularity
and im p sure that dickins was trying to write accessible popular fiction

so the argument is null
there has been & always will be the d&d die with many sides; it's still one die:
a rectangle is not always a square but a square is always a rectangle, dig?
how presumptuous to think that a reblogged poem means it wasn't read or that it meant nothing to the reader
do you even know what a reblog is?
it means you actually like something enough to put it on your own blog
...damn gurl

how presumptuous to think that b/c information is disseminated digitally that it will result in the death of the story
puh leeze gurl puh leeze
the spread of information is a good thing & ppl are still takin their damn time

what is it anyway if not meant to be consumed (en masse or not)
i gotta get this out and it might mean it's not like 26 years, but it could be
i could be marguerite duras and write the same fucking story of my life over and over again
...but you wouldn't know

ultimate fallacy word = "only"
don't use it; scrap that it hurts yer argument bb

i see you lookin, i know yer curious
i have a god dammned stat counter
i write about anything
today, tumblr, google, gun control, and there's nothing to stop me
not even you
...i say this with love
b/c you opened the door when i wasn't even knocking

i will say this: great stories, poems & literature stay in the human consciousness for a reason: it's b/c fiction can tell a certain truth that reality will never tell

2.21.13 thoughts on alt lit and poetry

i.

love comes in waves but i would rather it  be a constant gentle whirring

a white noise humming gently lulling everyone

to forget its presence

          its there under the surface

helping us sleep or relax or live

iia.

sometimes i wish i never went to college

i did this before college

and it’s not like college is responsible for my craft

it was like joining the most expensive book club known; with contests held every few weeks for written work on the read work and yeah; but more like swimming b/c that’s always a contest between yourself and the clock

iib. 

alt lit: it's hard to know/recognize sincerity (don't get me wrong; i love irony, but i find it hard/disengenous to pull off) 

alt lit: a warm embrace by a community of people looking for a voice amidst confusion

i have always believed that any one can write and read poetry

which makes it so beautiful

but of course i am speaking with bias

iii. 

w/e you decide to label it, poetry is embedded in humanity itself

we produced poems long before anything else

ancient rhythms/modern rhythms/post modern rhythms

all signifiers

to indicate a time, a cursor blinking on a line of data of human history

somehow i think we moved away from this

as a result of war and technology

but alt lit is a way to give poetry back to humanity

to bring it back to the vernacular

allowing the mundane/fascinating story of this century to be told

we live during simultaneous wars

i don't think the romantics ever could have imagined something more frightening than tuberculosis (the “a bomb”; “drones”; “aids”; “world war”; “famine”; “malaria”...et al)

iv. 

this is all i can do

all i have ever done

as long as i can remember

so...

v.

i want to write about love and triumph and defeat of neo barbarians

i want to write a love poem to your consciousness that you share with me

i want to write a love poem to the singular and the masses

i want to write to a world that doesn’t yet exist and make it into existence with my fiction

i want to tell a story of love and triumph

but i already said that

vi.

i was never comfortable with irony

in terms of audience reception

like do you think they’ll get it?

who cares says my other self;

they are 2 sides to one coin

for lack of a better metaphor

see: taoism

see: buddhism

the middle path

between darkness and light

epilogue:  

i have given away so many of my possessions and i always feel light weight afterwards

and i think some other girl will be able to wear that dress and feel confident like i did when i used to wear that dress

traditional blogging is tough

hey i promise not to forget about this space. it's just that sometimes this blank page in the blogger editor is overwhelming, but i am going to be better about it. until then here are some gifs i made:

LYL: my first ebook

I have been attracted to the alt lit light, so I made an ebook:

pdf file: LYL an alt lit pdf.pdf

read/share/enjoy

this mass and the universe